Some people are in your life for one reason only--to feed off you. They soak up your energy, enthusiasm, wisdom, time, CD's, DVD's, sofa, car, jewelry, shoes, or whatever you have that appeals to them. It's easy to form bonds with these people because they're always around; but it's a trap. I don't have to tell you to watch out for these non-symbiotic relationships because you know; you've been sapped before. I just wonder if some of us happen to be that way and we don't know it. Are you the culprit?
Consider this a friendly reminder to take with you joy, love, peace, laughter, encouragement, wisdom, and whatever other talents or qualities you have by which someone you know can benefit. It's not always about monetary offerings (but who doesn't like getting treated on occasion too); it's about nurturing those you claim to love, and being fed in the process. Look at the babies. They come here with nothing, needing everything; yet, when have you ever felt so important, so valuable, so warm and so unconditionally loved as when that little face smiles and reaches for you? If I didn't know that feeling, and if I hadn't been blessed...
Women are always saying they don't need a man to validate them. Okay, I don't know what they mean by that exactly, and it's probably different for each woman, but let me play devil's advocate here briefly. Adam was on earth alone, the only one of his kind. He saw the animals paired up and eventually he got his own mate, designed just for him. They were to do some very important things with the land, and with themselves. Follow me now.
Woman was designed for man, to be a complement to man, and they were to fulfill each other's needs--the design was perfect, you know. When they sinned, God said to Eve, "your craving will be for your husband." I didn't make this up; Genesis 3:16, people. So while some of our more forward-thinking, ambitious predecessors sought to expand women's rights and changed the world, and though that's all good, know that we were made for men, and therefore feel it when they are absent from our lives. We feel it when they are present in our lives too, and don't we feel all the more powerful, sexy, desirable, and feminine when we have a man of our very own? ...
Someone recently mused, "the purpose of it all is...," and I don't know what he was going through at the time, but he got me to thinking about life. The way I see it, in their perfect state, humans were created with more than the basic equipment. They had the capacity for far more than we do in our imperfection; but still we inherit the basics, for starters. For example, we have senses designed to take in the life experience--eyes to see (colors, flowers, oh he's fine!), ears to hear (sweet music, a baby's first word), a mouth to taste (mercy--food is my friend), nerve endings to help us feel (infant kisses, warm massage, great sex--hello!), a nose to smell (your favorite fragrance, baking, breakfast). But we were given so much more too--vision to see what is and what's not in front of us; instinct, intuition, imagination, and so on. Feel where I'm going with this?
We are so wonderfully made, that even in our imperfect state, the majority of us are able to enjoy so much, on so many levels, for whatever time we are allowed to be here. Then we also have free will that allows us to make...
"For as they were in those days before the flood, eating and drinking, men marrying and women being given in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark: and they took no note until the flood came and swept them all away, so the presence of the Son of man will be."--Matthew 24:38, 39.
So I got to thinking, we can get so caught up in our own mess, so distracted by what we can see, so busy doing whatever we deem worthy at the time, we miss really important things. When I turned on Sprout this morning, Cookie Monster was telling us the meaning of the word important. He said something that means a lot to you; that's important. But I happen to know that sometimes we let those things that mean a lot to us simmer on the backburner until we get through this, or finish that, or rearrange this over here. And that's not really fair, nor is it wise. We put off going to school until.... We put off fixing that resume up until.... We slack on grocery shopping until.... It goes from big stuff to seemingly small stuff, but it's true. And then...
Time is a luxury.You have been afforded the opportunity to utilize yours for anything you choose.But what have you done thus far?I know you've heard this before, but what if your time was up in like ten minutes? What if you died suddenly? What have you done (not what do you plan to do)?Who would miss you?Whose life have you affected?Do your loved ones even know they're loved ones?Does anything matter to you, or are you just here taking up space for a time? What are you missing? What about your kids? What are you doing with the time you have been given? So many questions, so little time.
From the mind of: Tonya D. Floyd, No better time than the present... www.Versatili-T.com
I was thinking about how sometimes we get so preoccupied, we forget to praise God despite the circumstances. You know how when things are going very well, and bricks are falling into place, and the sun is shining—we can’t help but give God glory for what He’s done in our lives? Then sometimes when things are on the flip side, we pray and we pray and we pray, but we can’t see as clearly how things were wonderful at another time, how we were delivered the last time, or how we felt when we knew God was in our corner and the world wasn’t so big and bad. I didn’t say we ignore it or forget; I said we can’t see it as clearly as the good times. Well, I’m guilty too, so I figured I’d remind everyone in my reach including myself to take a good snapshot of that higher-than-high, wonderful, over-the-top feeling and keep it in our pocket to peek at when the skies are gray and the worst is all you can see around you. Then make it your business to describe that feeling and the gifts received when you were on top, giving God the glory...
I decided that I'll send out some throwback thoughts when I can't put out a fresh, new one; and I was trying to see which one I would send. Then this snooty broad at work passed me on the way to the bathroom, and I thought: The toilet, and death--two great equalizers. You eventually have to give it up to both, no matter who you are, or who you think you are. And I thought of the perfect TDF Throwback to send today:
14. Anger is like diarrhea. You can't hold it in no matter how hard you try; it burns, pains you from deeply within, and sometimes it can be violent. You just have to find a way to release it in a safe and healthy environment. If you don't get it all out the first time, keep going back until you do. You'll feel much better when it's over.
If you're wondering why you are missing something, or if you feel like you’re less than whole, or if you’re waiting for something good to happen in your life, perhaps you can speed up the process of getting whatever it is you’re lacking by offering kindnesses to others in the meantime. It’s possible--and probable--that your good things are on the way, but perhaps you just need to remember to focus on giving rather than receiving. Even if you’re someone who often helps others out, helps old ladies cross the street, or donates whatever to whomever, you could be overlooking the obvious, and that could be holding you back.
We don’t usually get to choose our own assignments to better us. They’re chosen for us, and when they present themselves, we must view them as opportunities for growth and move accordingly. And don’t worry if you feel you can’t do it; just ask for help and it’s there. If we choose to reject these assignments or ignore them, we hold up our own blessings. It’s like when we as parents instruct our children to do specific things, and they choose instead to do what’s more pleasant or easier, or to do...
Continuing on the thought from last week about purging files from my life, it took longer than the weekend, but I have identified what needs to go. I figured I should share this with you so you can decide if there's some cleaning you need to do. So, here are the categories I came up with.
There are certain parts of your long-term memory and day-to-day that require archiving--holding onto it for later use, just in case, maybe like you hold on to tax files for a few years until the audit likelihood is clear (maybe a functional relationship with a co-parent). Some parts you can delete altogether like junk mail (flirtations from losers, arguments with an ex-). Other parts you place in a hold pattern until you figure out what to do with them, or how you may need them today or tomorrow (new relationships, budding friendships, people who make you smile); there's something to it, but you just can't justify deleting it cause you can't get it back once it's gone. Then there's stuff you have held on to for so long, it's way expired, nobody will ever need it again, and you're just afraid to let it go...
I was thinking about my current job, how I got to this point, and what I need to do next. It occurred to me that people place different values on their versions of success, and I tried to figure out what I now consider a measure of my own. It's true I'm not exactly where I once thought I would be at this age, but I realized through the different stages, phases, and episodes of my life, I've done quite a few things I never knew I could or would. Then I got to thinking how just like changing majors in college, I've had to adjust for some adjustments around me and find a whole different direction.
Okay, for those I've lost and will lose soon, let me ask you what does success look like? Take a person who makes large commissions off customers in sales, and is miserable in his/her job, but makes six figures and can afford a big pretty home with all the accessories and amenities. Then take another person who is a school teacher, living her life-long dream of teaching our youth and making a difference, is blissfully happy in her job, but only makes a fraction of that, and would...
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